Monday, July 27, 2009

Being A Corporate Pilot Is Tough...

Sometimes my job includes doing terrible things like spending a day at Canada's Wonderland, a roller coaster-filled theme park just outside of Toronto. Shucks. It is a sacrifice, but sometimes you just have to do what you have to do as a corporate pilot. You have to take the bad with the good.

The "bad" in this case included several roller coasters, all of which I tried eagerly. I love controlled risk. I love the thrill of sitting in the back of a roller coaster and knowing the front of the train is already over the gigantic drop. And that I am certainly about to die. What a rush! I have to sit in the back so nothing behind is slowing me down! Sometimes the forward view is full of people's hands, but I love not being dragged by carts behind me. Who has time for that?! Not me. Not when I am slaving away as a corporate pilot spending a day at Canada's Wonderland.

I admit this isn't my first time here. Two summers ago, I spent the day here with Terry. Thanks to an empty stomach and going backwards on a ride (I know it's embarrassing to admit, but it is the space ship-looking ride that goes in circles and upside down that did it to me), I got pretty wheezy for a few minutes and had to sit a ride out. I remembered that experience fondly during this visit and avoided that terrible machine! I hit all the big coasters and enjoyed every single one of them. When I started to feel hungry, I made sure to suffer through a teriyaki rice bowl before attempting the next ride in order to prevent being sick. Just part of the job of being a corporate pilot. And who would have thought a rice bowl at an amusement park would be so good?

Highlight of the day: their new ride, Behemoth. It's as ridiculous as the name implies, and I thought I was going to die an agonizing death for sure. The first incline just kept going, and twenty minutes later I reached the top. By this time, I was so high that I knew I should have decided against this ride. But then I started going down...and down...and down a little more! And I couldn't breathe! And I felt no gravity for at least fourteen hours (but I wasn't keeping track). And then it took me up another huge hill and repeated the terror again! And then it had the audacity to do it yet again! It was amazing. Too bad the line was so long, or I would have thought about risking life and limb...again. Sometimes, as a corporate pilot, you have to rough it like that.

Someone else accidentally bought an ice cream cookie sandwich and gave it to me (some of this statement is false). I couldn't let it go to waste and actually enjoyed myself, despite the two ingredients being ice cream and chocolate chip cookies. After choking the sandwich down, I realized how quickly the day was disappearing. A light sprinkling of rain commenced as I people-watched Canadians for a few minutes (never disappointing). Then I successfully found the borrowed U-Haul minivan in the sea-of-minivans parking lot and drove the hour back to Hamilton.

I tell ya, being a corporate pilot is rough. I guess I will continue to hunker down and continue to bare it.


  1. Hey Micah! I love reading about all of your cool adventures! Sounds like you have tons of fun.

  2. Sounds like a lot of fun! Hmm maybe I should go to pilot school


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